Dear FEMEN,
I wrote this letter to you to explain on why, as a feminist, I cannot support you.
You see, I am a Christian woman who chooses to cover my
body, including my head.
I have seen your stories all over the world. Painting your
bodies and exposing your breasts. That’s okay. A lot of women do it and like
you, I don’t like the double standard that women can go to a beach and if she
takes off her top, she’s arrested but when a man does it, it’s normal.
I understand that.
The thing I don’t understand is that you think I’m a slave
to my faith. You think I cover my head
and my body because I am “oppressed” when in reality, I think The real
oppression, particularly in this country, is the oppression young girls feel
about having the perfect bodies so they become slaves to diets and eating disorders.
They watch TV and see all the expensive, revealing, tight, name brand clothes
and listen to the advertisements saying they must buy them to have an identity
in this world.
In this country, that is the enemy in my mind.
My faith in Christ does not bound me to slavery. It sets me
free. Before I had a real relationship with my God I was bound in depression,
lost in hopelessness, and day dreamed every day of the many ways to kill
myself. Why? Because the cruelty of society. Society who told me I was fat,
ugly, stupid, and worthless.
I found my true happiness in my faith and I dedicate my life
to serving God. I dream of going around the world and give food for the hungry,
build homes for the homeless, and give the broken, a hug and a crying shoulder.
You see, I’m sure in many ways, we’re a like. You hate to
see suffering. As do I. I hate it when people use faith and twist it into legalism
and bondage. Telling people that every little thing they do, they will go to
hell. That they must do what their religious figures say to earn brownie points
with God. I hate seeing a weeping woman. My blood boils when I hear of domestic
abuse news stories.
We both want liberation and freedom for women. So you see?
We’re not so different.
Except there is something that separates us. You see, if a
woman expresses herself, say, taking off her clothes and screaming “Fuck your
morals!” I believe she has that right, and I won’t try to take that away from
her. (Along with being a Christian, I’m also a Libertarian.)
You on the other hand tell women they should take off their
clothes when they don’t want to (You’re not demanding it, no, but still…) You
say women are meant to think for themselves, but when women tell you I want to
keep my body cover and wear my hijab/ burqa/ Niqub/ head covering, you say “There
signs say that there are free, but there eyes say help me!”
Don’t you think that’s kind of patronizing? That’s you
saying “they’re brain washed” “they’re dumb” “I have to be their voice!”
If I need you to be my voice, I’ll s end you an email. But
until then, I have a voice of my own and I use it freely.
You see, my faith in God was MY choice! Choosing to put on
the head covering was MY choice! (No one in my town, church, or even family wears
the head covering, and many think I’m insane!) Remaining a virgin was MY choice
(My parents were dreading, yet preparing the day as a teenager that I ask for
Birth control because I was in love. They were so happy when I asked for a purity
ring instead.
I am a free woman. I made choices in my life. Some of my
choices are not popular in our society, and that’s okay. I was never meant to
fit in. I stand up to injustice. But the difference between you and me: I do
it with reason and tact.
Before I act I think “Will this truly help? “
I would never disrespect you, FEMEN. If you gave a speech, I
would not come up to you and through water bottles, as you have with priests. I
would never say to fuck everything you believe in, as you do with my morals. I
would never saw down symbols or items you have such care for, as you did to my
faith’s cross. I would never go into your homes and meeting places and disrupt
your time together, as you have done by going into my churches during people’s
precious moment of prayer.
I would never say I know better than you, as you claim to do
for so many Christian, Muslim, and other women of faith.
You do not speak for me and I do not speak for you.
Let me live my life the way I choose to live.
THAT, FEMEN, IS FREEDOM.
Freedom and religion are mutually exclusive.
ReplyDeleteThis is why Feminism (real Feminism) is incompatible with religion.
And a "Real" feminist would let women make up their own minds and choose their own paths to take.
ReplyDeleteYes! Of course, everyone is free to make their own decisions, butthat doesn't automatically make it Feminism.
DeleteChristianity, mormonism, islam, judaism, sikhism, etc. are all incompatible constructs with Feminism, which is why so many womyn are speaking out against it.
Nocturnus, what makes something "real feminism" and someone a "real feminist"? What makes you the authoritative figure in deciding what is real feminism and who is a real feminist?
ReplyDeleteThis my problem with FEMEN and other feminists who claims they are the only real feminist and every other feminist who disagrees with them. According to FEMEN, it you don't support FEMEN then you're not a real feminist.
I never said I was the "authority" of anything. I simply stated a legitimate position, because this piece is misrepresentative of what Feminism is. When Feminism is mad out to be something that is (in any way) compatible with religion, I am quick to speak out against it, so that it doesn't influences as many minds.
DeleteReal Feminism is real liberation. And liberation is incompatible with religion. Especially ones that subjugate and oppress/teach womyn that men have dominion over them, and that they are the cause of sin, or that they are to "submit" to other authoritative figures.
Quite frankly, I don't care whether or not you support FEMEN, but it is true, that those people against FEMEN do not support Feminism. Feminism isn't the watered-down, liberal bullshit you see on television or hear about on the radio. Some people tend to forget that these religions have disgusting protrayals of womyn, and that they only demean them. You don't have to be naked to be free, but shame and modesty don't define freedom at all.
"Womyn?" What the heck is a "womyn"? Its just "woman".
Delete"And liberation is incompatible with religion." Says all the people, both men and women, who found liberation through religion and spirituality.
"but it is true, that those people against FEMEN do not support Feminism. Feminism isn't the watered-down, liberal bullshit you see on television or hear about on the radio." So all the feminists who do not support FEMEN (like Meghan Murphy of Feminist Current) aren't feminist anymore due to your definition? Again, what makes your definition justifiable to all other feminists that make it acceptable? Some these non-FEMEN feminists are still pretty radical and have almost all the same goals of FEMEN.
"You don't have to be naked to be free, but shame and modesty don't define freedom at all." Then why go topless at all?
No "womyn". I don't use the demeaning version of that term.
Delete*"Says all the people, both men and women, who found liberation through religion and spirituality."* Not really. Religion teaches compliance, submission, obedience, fear, and self hatred. That, to any logical person is incompatible with liberation. It is impossible to be liberated by something that dictates the very essence of your being.
*"So all the feminists who do not support FEMEN (like Meghan Murphy of Feminist Current) aren't feminist anymore due to your definition? Again, what makes your definition justifiable to all other feminists that make it acceptable? Some these non-FEMEN feminists are still pretty radical and have almost all the same goals of FEMEN. "*
It's not so much as they don't support FEMEN, as it is that they support misogyny and patriarchy, while claiming to be "feminists". These are hat we label, kindergarten fauxminists.
Many of them are too comfortable with capitalism, and believe in "reform" as opposed to revolution. Not only that, but they marginalize important issues like racism (actual racism), sexism, and prefer to create non-existent issues, instead of focusing on the real ones.
They are more of liberal cronies than Feminists. Not the same thing. If they were to study the history of Feminism, as well as it's purpose, they would be faced with the fact that many of their beliefs conflict with legitimate/actual Feminism.
*"Then why go topless at all?"*
Because there is too much shame and stigma attached to the form of a womyn. There are too many bullshit constructs like "purity", "modesty", "chastity", and many others that reduce womyn to sexual objects to be hidden away under numerous clothes. Disgust must be expressed in order for there to be human progress, or religion could plague us until we are all dead.
"No "womyn". I don't use the demeaning version of that term."
DeleteWhat the hell? Demeaning version? The word "woman" isn't demeaning? What are you on about?
"Religion teaches compliance, submission, obedience, fear, and self hatred."
Not all of them. Certain religions like Sikhism or Buddhism teach you to better yourself.
"It's not so much as they don't support FEMEN, as it is that they support misogyny and patriarchy, while claiming to be "feminists"."
????????????????
"Because there is too much shame and stigma attached to the form of a womyn."
No there isn't. Even if there is why do you care what others' views of shame affect you or other women.
"There are too many bullshit constructs like "purity", "modesty", "chastity","
Constructs? What are you a tumblrista? Oh, sorry. tumblrystuh... I used the "less demeaning" version.
"Disgust must be expressed in order for there to be human progress, or religion could plague us until we are all dead."
There already is disgust but I think you're a bit paranoid there.
Yes, it is demeaning. Maybe it isn't to you, but that is because you are too comfortable with what this system has fed you, so you see no problem with that word and its origins. Hell, I wouldn't even be surprised if you actually believed that womyn came from mankind, out of his rib, and our sole purpose is to serve them.
DeleteAnd yes, all religions attain the very idea that human beings are inherently bad, and therefore, are in need of discipline/control. There is not a religion in that exists that doesn't teach that, with the exception of Wicca.
And yes, many mainstream fauxminists are far too comfortable with the weakness of "reform", dependence on the male system (as well as the defense of it), and capitalism. But I wouldn't expect you to understand that. A great mind once said; "Give them bread and circuses and they will never revolt."
See, what you fail to understand (this is just one of many things), is that, when young girls are constantly fed messages that are negative (like the ones I've previously listed), it begins to influence their thoughts, and how they think of themselves/treat others.
And yes, "constructs". This term isn't unheard of, even for people who aren't as privileged as yourself. I am not a component of a blog, I am simply less ignorant/more genuine than you. You defend religion, because you believe that this false sense of tolerance will bring more peace to the world. You are terribly mistaken.
As you attempt to degrade my identity, you've shown that you are purely ignorant, and uninformed. Sorry, but you need to do some research before calling yourself a Feminist. You aren't even close.
You inability to comprehend my intellect has caused me to lose interest in discussing this further with you. I could kill less braincells smoking crack.
"but that is because you are too comfortable with what this system has fed you, so you see no problem with that word and its origins."
DeleteOh my God, the word "woman" apparently has some bad etymological history associated with men but I don't see it as bad. I'm so horrible.
"Hell, I wouldn't even be surprised if you actually believed that womyn came from mankind, out of his rib, and our sole purpose is to serve them."
Don't believe that, I'm a deist.
"And yes, all religions attain the very idea that human beings are inherently bad, and therefore, are in need of discipline/control. There is not a religion in that exists that doesn't teach that, with the exception of Wicca."
Religion or no religion, humans are actually pretty crappy people.
"See, what you fail to understand (this is just one of many things), is that, when young girls are constantly fed messages that are negative (like the ones I've previously listed), it begins to influence their thoughts, and how they think of themselves/treat others."
Or they good just think independently, like men do.
"This term isn't unheard of, even for people who aren't as privileged as yourself. ... You defend religion, because you believe that this false sense of tolerance will bring more peace to the world. You are terribly mistaken."
Check you own privilege, dear. Those who call others privileged or tell others to check their privilege usually are hypocritical. As if protesting topless will bring peace.
"Sorry, but you need to do some research before calling yourself a Feminist. You aren't even close."
And you need to learn reading and comprehension. Never said I was a feminist.
"You inability to comprehend my intellect has caused me to lose interest in discussing this further with you. I could kill less braincells smoking crack."
Your intellect is flawed. Bye-bye, don't let the door hit you on the way out.
ugh. sexist assholes like you make me sick. so, because she doesn't identify as a subset of the male sex, you feel its appropriate to try and invalidate her position with your gynophobic position?? you talk about lack of reading comprehension, but based on this conversation, she never said that going topless will bring peace.
Deleteand then this: "Your intellect is flawed." coming from a so-called "deist" any logical person would say that's a compliment.
So her friends came out to play too? I'm guessing she complained.
Delete"Womyn" or "wimin" or whatever is just nonsensical alternate spelling for feminists who are just too paranoid of men.
Using the word "woman" or identifying as one doesn't make you a subset of the male sex. Women aren't subset of men just because of wording.